Popularity: unranked [?]

Dick Cheney says he loves California – out here the rich and famous can shoot people and get away with it.

Jay Leno

The right to bear arms is slightly less ludicrous than the right to arm bears.

Chris Addison

A law banning the sale of assault weapons has expired, which means it’s now legal to buy Uzis and AK 47s. The NRA said that now its owners can protect their families from up to 200 burglars at once.

Conan OBrien

Popularity: unranked [?]

A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.

Doug Larson

Popularity: unranked [?]

A neighbour put his budgie in the mincing machine and invented shredded tweet.

Chic Murray

A 46-year-old doctor in Guernsey, England, has had to quit his job because he couldn’t stop having sex with his female patients. And here’s the scary part — he’s a veterinarian.

Jay Leno

Popularity: unranked [?]

Popularity: unranked [?]

To spare oneself from grief at all costs can be achieved only at the price of total detachment, which excludes the ability to experience happiness.

Erich Fromm

Popularity: unranked [?]

Popularity: unranked [?]

No cowboy was ever faster on the draw than a grandparent

pulling a baby picture out of a wallet.

Anonymous

The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.

Sam Levenson

Popularity: unranked [?]

Popularity: unranked [?]

It’s graduation time around New York. We’ve a lot of honor students here…Yes your honor, no your honor, not guilty your honor!

Dave Letterman

A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that ‘individuality’ is the key to success.

Robert Orben

The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet.

Aristotle

It’s not your blue blood, your pedigree or your college degree. It’s what you do with your life that counts.

Millard Fuller

Teachers open the door, but you must enter by yourself.

Proverb

Popularity: unranked [?]