funny quotes, just fun

Guns Quotes

They say that guns dont kill people, people kill people. Well I think the gun helps. If you just stood there and yelled BANG, I dont think youd kill too many people. Eddie...

Gun Quotes

Dick Cheney says he loves California - out here the rich and famous can shoot people and get away with it. Jay Leno The right to bear arms is slightly less ludicrous than the right to arm bears. Chris Addison A law banning the sale of assault weapons has expired, which means it's now legal to buy Uzis and AK 47s. The NRA said that now its owners can protect their families from up to 200 burglars at once. Conan...

Guilt quotes

A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience. Doug...

Gross Quotes

A neighbour put his budgie in the mincing machine and invented shredded tweet. Chic Murray A 46-year-old doctor in Guernsey, England, has had to quit his job because he couldn’t stop having sex with his female patients. And here’s the scary part — he’s a veterinarian. Jay...

freshstep cat

...

Grief quotes

To spare oneself from grief at all costs can be achieved only at the price of total detachment, which excludes the ability to experience happiness. Erich...

Grandparents quotes

No cowboy was ever faster on the draw than a grandparent pulling a baby picture out of a wallet. -- Anonymous The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy. -- Sam Levenson No cowboy was ever faster on the draw than a grandparent pulling a baby picture out of a wallet. Anonymous The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy. Sam...

Graduation Quotes

It’s graduation time around New York. We've a lot of honor students here...Yes your honor, no your honor, not guilty your honor! Dave Letterman A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success. Robert Orben The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet. Aristotle It's not your blue blood, your pedigree or your college degree. It's what you do with your...

Government Quotes

Government is like a baby. An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other. Ronald Reagan Bush gave an interview and he said people will vote for him because 'They've seen me weep, they’ve seen me laugh, and they’ve seen me hug.' These are the same qualifications for a Tickle Me Elmo. Bill Maher Big news on CNN, a search has uncovered illegal biochemical agents, toxins and other dangerous substances. Not in Iraq, in Rush Limbaugh's medicine...

big bad wolf

...